Monday, March 31, 2014

5 Items on your Baby Bucket List

There are so many things to do before you have kids and there are so many lists posted out there about it.  My next blog post is about the ludicrous things some of these lists tell you to do before having kids, but meanwhile here are my top 5 things to appreciate and do more of before having kids.


1. Sleep in now. I am not really one for sleeping in, but now that I can't, I really wish I had.


2. Take long baths or showers. After baby, those showers literally become cardio sprints. You absolutely WILL hear a baby crying as soon as you enter the shower, even if there isn't one.  If your child is old enough to be awake, you feel guilty or worried that something will happen like finding a way up the stairs even though it's gated off.

3. Eat. Yup, simple as that. After baby you will be so busy you won't think about eating. Once your bundle of joy grows up and starts eating real food, 95% of your meals will be toddler leftovers.  Crusty mac n cheese that has been sitting out for an hour... mmm.

4. Watch some movies. Yes you plan on renting a lot of movies, and your spouse will probably be the only one that makes it all the way through. 15 minutes into the movie you will be asleep. Every. Time. Thinking about going to the movies?  Let's be real: Price of 2 movie tickets $16.50 x 2 = $33 + $10 for popcorn and soda (hey you deserve it, see #3) + baby sitter for 3 hours $30 = That's $73 to see a movie that you will fall asleep during. Go see a movie now before you have to take out a second mortgage to do it!

5. Spend some quality time with your friends. I have, sort of, addressed this in my baby shower gifts post. Let's look at it a little further:
Who are we kidding... there will be
no ironing ever again.
  • 0-3 months the recluse stage - You physically can't socialize. You are exhausted, leaking, and hormonal. There is no way you will be able to engage in meaningful conversation.
  • 4-9 months the schedule stage - Baby takes 3 naps per day, ranging 1-3 hours per nap. You only have about a 2 hour awake window before they go down again, and you have to fit in feedings, tummy time, and countless diaper changes. That leaves 15 minutes. You have 15 minutes to socialize.
  •  9-12 months the mobile stage - They are down to 2 naps per day but when they are awake you're just trying to keep them away from cords, plugs, stairs, plants, dogs, and all that other stuff you didn't think was dangerous. Plus you have to feed them twice as much, which is twice as messy. The biggest annoyance is the amount of stuff you have to lug with you. It would appear you are going on a 2 week vacation, when in fact you are spending the afternoon with a friend.
  • 1-2 years the trying-not-to-let-my-kid-kill-themselves stage - You are finally down to one nap and you think you can socialize. However, your toddler is now walking/running, climbing, eating items as if they have Pica disorder, and generally putting their life in danger on a daily basis.  Good luck being social.
Not to worry future parents, I have heard you can do all of these things again someday. Maybe in 2 years, or 5 years... definitely after they move out.

Have something to add? Please leave it in the comments, some future Mom will thank you!

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