Toddlers, Tears, and Tryptophan

It's Thanksgiving week and I am questioning why I decided to try and get fit during the holidays. It really doesn't matter much, since we will be staying home with the kiddos, just our little family. I have a turkey to cook, a can of green beans, some instant mashed potatoes and stove top stuffing. Classy!

Will I be making paper-handprint-turkeys with my kids? No. I'm just not that kind of Mom I guess.

My kids have picked this week to become over-the-top drama monsters. Even my happy baby has been grumpy. I will take a guess at teething. Kenzie's second birthday is the 1st so she is in full-on terrible two mode.

For your enjoyment here is the latest in what has been making her scream and cry:

• I turned on music.
• I turned off music.
• I tore a page out of her book to color.
• She wanted the other pair of plain white socks.
• Her felt Christmas tree fell down.
• She had to get in the cart at Target.
• She had to get out of the cart when we were done at Target.
• She had to take a nap.
• She woke up from her nap.
• Her felt Christmas tree fell down.
• I put her fruit snacks in the big green bowl, not the small blue one.
• I tried to read her a new book.
• I read the Bear books out of order.
• I wouldn't let her get into the oatmeal canister.
• Her felt Christmas tree fell down.
• I changed her bedding.
• I gave Ketcher one of her toys to play with.
• I was using a blanket.
• I laid on the couch.
• I told her she couldn't dance on my laptop.
• She couldn't use the plastic play fork to stab the dog.
• I made her wear a shirt to the store.
• Her felt Christmas tree fell down.
• I didn't get the toothbrush out fast enough.
• I made the wrong mac n cheese. (apparently)
• I hot glued sticky tabs on the Christmas tree so it wouldn't fall down.

This is just from today.

Anyway, I am sure most of my readers are traveling or planning to travel so happy trails to you.

I will have my first set of before and after pics posted next week. I really have to get my shit together on eating better. That will be my December focus with the exception of the 4 parties we have to go to and Christmas. If you have any ideas or recommendations please message me!

As always, thank you for reading, and Happy Thanksgiving!

The Mandy Project: Day 20

For the record, that is not my arm.

 

For the complete Mandy Project click here.

It's day 20. Only 70 more days left.

My workouts have progressed like this:

• Week 1: Excited and in excruciating amounts of pain.
• Week 2: Motivated to see if I could do better than week 1. Still sore.
• Week 3: Ugh, I really don't want to do this, but I made a commitment. Butt and abs are still sore. I am pushing myself hard during the workout, but I have to force myself to get off my ass and push play. I haven't missed one yet.
• Next week is all cardio and then the workouts are switched up. I think this will help keep me on task.

My eating strategy progression:

• Week 1: Definitely ate light meals. No issues. Mostly nauseous.
• Week 2: Still watching my food intake, without real difficulty, although by the end of the week I was starting to get hungry more often.
• Week 3: I am starving. I don't understand why, considering I am still eating normally. I ate a half a box of teddy grahams crouched in a corner of the kitchen. I felt like Smeagol from Lord of the Rings.
• I have joined a 5 day clean eating crockpot group to help keep me accountable. I hope this jump starts my healthy food efforts, and keeps me out of the toddler snack cupboard.

My accomplishments:

• I retired the rest of my maternity clothes for good. No lingering pieces in my closet to default to when I just don't feel it.
• I upgraded my swim suit from 2-piece "mom" suit back to my pre-baby bikinis.
• I have to wear a belt with all my jeans now. The belt notch is back to my pre-baby notch.
• I can stay up until 10:30pm. (Although I prefer not to.)  
• My energy is off the charts! I've been cleaning closets, moving furniture, and I still have time to make dinner and give the kids a bath.
• My stress level is WAY down. There is just something about being able to handle all the crap that falls on my lap, as long as I am taking care of myself first.

Honestly this project is really shaping up to be a game changer.  My kids are going to know the real me, not the stressed out Mom they have been with so far. I am able to run around, play, dance, give piggy back rides, and just have a whole lot more fun in general now.

Kenzie has been getting into it too. When Dan's home, I do my workout in the morning and she creeps upstairs to join me occasionally. P90X is much harder with a toddler sitting on your abs.

She refuses to workout with clothes on.

Coming soon... 10 days away from the first set of before and after photos. 

The Mandy Project: Botox

There are not many before and after photos of Botox on the internet, unless you are looking at a doctors website. So here are the real before and after pictures from a normal 34 year old female.

I know there are a lot of people shaking their heads at me right now, but this is The Mandy Project. This is what I want for myself. I am not doing this for anyone else except me. So either read on, or shut it down.

To view the complete Mandy Project click here.

First of all, there is a lot of confusion over Botox. This does NOT plump up your face/lips/cheeks or anything else. This just freezes your muscles so you can't make wrinkles. That's all. It reduces wrinkles in some areas and can eliminate them in others. There are lots of areas you can't use Botox, like in your laugh lines, or under your eyes. You will not get Meg Ryan lips or look like you have had a facelift. The plumping of the face is dermal fillers. Totally different.

This is NOT Botox. This is dermal filler.

 

To be honest, I don't know what this is...

So now you know what it's not. See what it did for me...

I was doing my best surprised look.
At day 5 my eyebrows were too pointy.
At 2 weeks my eyebrows are no long pointy and everything is pretty smooth.
Don't pay any attention to my after-workout hair.

 

My scowl with an "11" between my brows.
Day 5 I could still see tiny lines.
2 weeks after, no lines at all.
Downside: My toddler thinks I never get mad any more.

Wrinkles around my eyes.
At day 5 there was only slightly less wrinkles.
At 2 weeks the area is nearly wrinkle free.

I wish I could show you a good before/after full face shot, but there isn't one. I either doctored up the photos I had, to limit the wrinkles, or the light diminished them. I guess it doesn't really matter. Here you can see that even after the Botox I can still make normal facial expressions.

Angry is the only one I really can't nail
down any more. My kids love it!

If you are considering Botox yourself, here are a few more details you might want.

Does it hurt? Not really. It was a series of about 14 shots to my face. The needle is incredibly thin so mostly it doesn't hurt at all. There were a few times Dan stuck the needle in too deep and it hurt for a second but otherwise, it was totally worth it.

Usually you pay by the unit. The average total cost of a unit is about $10-$15 and the total is usually between $375-$550 depending on if you use "Botox" or "Dysport" which is cheaper. Also depends on how many sights you have done and how much they need to use on you in each sight.

Who gives it? Some dentists, some doctors, all dermatologists, some nurses. You will know. They will advertise it. You may seem skeptical about going to a dentist for Botox, but how many other doctors do you know that give shots to people all day long?

It takes about a week to see results and it lasts about 3-4 months. Over time you might only need it every 6 months.

If you do it once you are going to want to do it again, and again. So beware.

The Mandy Project: Day 10

The Mandy Project: Day 10   Click here to see the whole project.

Let me start off by asking: Do you have a project yet? Make one.

The workouts:

As a reminder I am doing P90x (the original version).

The first 7 days were hard. I didn't know how hard to push myself during the videos, the 60+ minutes seemed daunting, and frankly just nailing down some of the moves seemed impossible. I wanted to take Tony (the trainer in the videos) and punch him in his fat neck, especially when he said the words "double time".

3 days were spent strength training + doing Ab Ripper X which is exactly what it was doing to my abs. Ripping the hell out of them and making them useless for the entire week. Do you know how often you use your abs in one day? Far too much. It hurt when I laughed, coughed, sneezed, tried to breathe... pretty much anything and everything and they STILL hurt!

The cardio workouts were Yoga, Plyometrics (jumps, squats, etc.) and Kenpo (just like Tae Bo from the 90s).

The two times I have done plyometrics I have almost puked. That's a tough workout. I was sweating and jumping, but after it was done, I really did feel great, I just had to be carried up and down the stairs the rest of the day.

The yoga workout, you would assume would be relaxing. I, of course, was sadly mistaken. I spent 90 minutes sweating and straining to get through it. This video is my least favorite. At several points I considered just shutting it off, but then I thought of all your emails telling me about your own projects and I kept going. So thank you readers, for sharing your hopes and plans with me, to keep me moving.

The Kenpo workout was my favorite video by far. I love pretending to beat someone senseless. I gave it my all and I was so sore for 2 days following. By the end of this program just let someone try and attack me, aside from the knives I carry, I will also be able to gouge your eyes out, kick you square where the sun-don't-shine and give you a mean left hook.

Overall, I was nauseous a lot but as the week wore on I started to look forward to my workouts. Maybe it's because that is ME time I desperately need and don't really care that I am spending it sweating and nearly puking on the floor.

The Diet

I still don't have a hard and fast diet plan. No drinks other than water and protein shakes. Oh no wait... I did have some wine and a cider on Friday when we had company over. No candy, baked goods, or other goodies.

If I want a snack I eat a bag of nut mix, strawberry zone bars, or a 100 calorie protein shake. Breakfast consists of 2 scrambled eggs and sometimes a strip or 2 of bacon. Lunch is a turkey wrap with some broccoli slaw (comes in a bag next to the cut up & bagged broccoli and salad kits) and a dash of Italian dressing. At dinner I just watch the amount that I eat. We usually have taco night, a pasta dish (no cheese), or chicken and veggies. So nothing too remarkable at this point.
 
Results so far:

I know it's only been 10 days, but there have been some changes.

I have more muscle definition in my arms and legs, which I thought was all in my head. How can I see results in only 10 days? However, Dan commented on my biceps as we were passing the baby between us at dinner. Of course they were probably just swollen from the beating they took that day, but it's a win!

Weight is the same; 114. I wasn't looking to lose pounds so that doesn't matter to me.

My clothes still seem to fit the same and I still have the post baby belly, you know loose and spongy.

I am not going to measure or take new photos until the 30 day mark. What's that? You want to see the before photos? I have uploaded them and they are ready to go but I just can't push that "post" button. I seriously can't. Once I have some results I will be able to share. Or possibly after a few pinot grigios this weekend. Who knows...

The Mandy Project: Week 1 - First Night Out

As of today I have completed 6 days of The Mandy Project. I will get into more detail about my first week in my next post. This post is about how I handled my first night out on my project.

Last night was date night. Some people get dressed up and go out for swanky dinner and drinks. We go to a hockey game.

This date night presented a set of complications & revelations to my Mandy Project.

So here's how it went down.

First of all, the last time I have been to Denver was several months ago, nay, over a year ago. A 90 minute drive later and we arrived at the stadium, sans kids. Just the two of us.

Time for dinner. I wanted a hot dog, nachos, a soft pretzel and some cinnamon sugar donuts for dessert. Instead, I chose to have a really horrible chicken taco. It was so bad I only ate half and I was STARVING, so that tells you just how bad it was.

Next, it was time to decide on a drink. We were in a stadium so I HAD to order a beer. I think it is a requirement. I ordered a $10 blue moon. I knew the beer would be warm by the time I finished despite the frosty stadium temperatures. Turns out I still don't like beer, no matter how many years I keep trying. Dan drank more than half of it.

The only calorie issue was the 6 cinnamon sugar donuts I had after the first period. OH... MY... they were delicious!!! The only sugar I have consumed since November 1 and it was totally worth the wait.

Since I am not a huge sports fan, I prefer to watch the crowd. Within the crowd I saw the lady I could end up, if I'm not careful.

She was setting with her daughter, who was probably 8 or 10 years old, and two younger boys. Pictured here is a typical Mom braid and 3 inch roots. This poor woman has lovingly invested in her children, but has totally neglected herself. She sat there scowling at the game and relented at 10pm when her 3 children begged her to let them stay during over time. I know this lady. She is all of us Mom's, lost to motherhood land. What will happen to her in 10 years when her children have left for college? Will she then take the time to invest in herself?  Will she think it's too late? 

On the flip side I had these girls to watch every 10 minutes.

I had a love-hate relationship with them last night. These gals have yet to have kids. They are probably 21 years old. I hate them as any normal woman would. However, I appreciate how they give me drive to workout harder, eat one less donut, and actually get on the ice and skate with my toddler the next time she goes. They represent the naïve 21 year old me, that I would never want to be again. However, there is no harm in trying to get my body back to it's trim healthy state.
Disclaimer: I still ate the extra donut.

What I didn't expect was that I would lose my temper during the game.  The coughing, young, hipster girl next to me, that had a voice like one of the mice from Cinderella, is screaming all during the periods that came after her third beer. I wanted to use my new Kenpo X moves on her that I learned that day - upper cut, hook, claw, kick - but I didn't. She was saved by the fact that my muscles hurt so bad it was painful to raise the beer to my lips. Lucky her.

I guess it wasn't just her, I was also irritated that at 7:15pm our babysitter texted us to let us know that the kids were sound asleep. The toddler had been since 6pm... a full hour before her normal bedtime. Yikes. Parents, you know what that means: She will be up an hour earlier than usual. Hello 5am!

I am already a little aggravated that I will be getting to bed late. Now I will be up extra early.

So not only are we leaving the stadium at 10pm... at least a half hour after my normal bedtime... we have a 90+ minute drive home and then I will be woke up at 5am. Goody.

Let's also factor in that I have never, ever, been to a hockey game that didn't go into over time. I am not even a little bit exaggerating. EVERY. FREAKING. TIME! So when the Avs were up at 2 minutes left, I absolutely knew, without a doubt, the Leafs were going to score. Of course they did and the game went into a 5 minute overtime, after the 5 minute break. No one scored. So then it went into a shoot off. Shoot out? I don't know... anyway there was one guy and one goal. Another break and another 5 minutes and we were finally leaving for home.

When we left the stadium we ran to the truck, Dan ran because he wanted to get out of the parking lot before it turned into a shit show and I ran to help burn off the donuts.

We were home at about 11:15pm and I fell asleep sometime after midnight. The miracle was that my toddler stayed in bed after she woke up at 6am and looked at books somewhat quietly. The baby slept until 7am for the first time since... possibly ever?

The down side is always the cost of a date night after kids. Let's recap:
$100 2 hockey tickets
$70 7 hours of babysitter (5pm to 11:30pm)
$20 Worst dinner ever
$20 Dan's beers
$10 My beer
$15 parking
$5 donuts
= $240 for a night out

This is why parents do not go out. We would all go broke.

So I would say my first night out on The Mandy Project was a success. I could have gorged myself, gotten wastey-face, and not been able to workout today, but I am up, writing this, and getting pumped for my workout this afternoon.

Have you started your Project?

Total Body Makeover: The Mandy Project

Yup you guessed it. I totally fell off the wagon in October. In fact, I wouldn't even call it falling off... the wagon broke down, caught on fire, and exploded.

What a terrible month. If you have been following my blog you get the gist of the horror I went through, but I decided to pick myself up out of the ash and get a plan together. It's a doozy.

I decided after looking at old pictures of myself that I wasn't satisfied with my present situation. I love being a Mom, and working from home, and all that crap, but I don't love the fact that I don't bother to take care of myself, because I barely leave the house.  Pretty sure Dan doesn't love that either, although he is smart enough to not say anything unless I ask.

The epiphany came mid-October. Dan had planned a surprise visitor for the weekend to cheer me up. He sent me to the beer store after some obscure bottles he was sure they wouldn't carry. I was searching for the absent bottles, when my friend walked up to me and asked if I needed any help. I kept looking at the beer boxes, not even looking at her, and said "yes, I can't find Sam Adams Pumpkin.  This is Oktoberst, but I don't see pumpkin." (If any of you watch arrested development this was a very Lucille Bluth moment.) She got in my personal space, so I looked up to find my dear friend Ashlee laughing and smiling at me. Hair perfect, stylishly dressed, and make up impeccable. I on the other hand had my hair in a straggly mom braid, minimal makeup, sensible sneakers and jeans with a mustard stain. EEK! 

Enough is enough already...

Here is what I decided:

I miss my blonde hair.  I went back to brown before and during pregnancy for the safety of the babies. Also, I didn't have the energy to do more than pull a comb through it after I got out of the shower. Sadly, I also worried I would look like those old ladies that are too tan and too fake blonde well into their wrinkly gross years. I decided to hell with it, so I have begun the slow transition to be a too tan, too fake blonde, old lady.

An old picture of some of my favorite blonde hair.
That's the goal.

Wrinkles. I look in the mirror in the morning and figure I must have been scowling all night long with the deep "11" etched into my forehead. My worry lines are getting really deep now that Kenzie is an adrenaline junkie like her daddy. I asked for one birthday present this year: Botox. Now don't shake your heads. I have had it done before (before pregnancies) so it's nothing new. No one even notices but me. However, Dan did one better for my birthday. He took the Botox course so it's really the gift that keeps giving.

Time for these wrinkles to go away.
This is also a good picture of how dark my hair is now.

Get my post baby body strong again. Thanks to good genes and carefully not gaining more than what was recommended, I managed to bounce back to my original weight. However, there was a time when I was strong and had plenty of lean muscle to help with all the furniture moving I so enjoy. I need to get back to that. I am also catching every illness that Dan brings home on his grubby dental scrubs. I know that if I were healthier, my immune system would be back to "superior".



Don't judge. I was at an 80s party which is why my hair looks like this.
Anyway this was at my peak shape back in 2010. This is my goal.

Clothes. Here's where Dan's candor really hit the mark. As I thoughtfully went through the list of things I want to change, he added that I dress like a "Mom".  It's true. My fall from Macy's has come as a bit of a shock to me as well. I could blame it on the fact that we don't have a Macy's here, or a mall for that matter, but that's not it. My Mom uniform is a plain target T-shirt and jeans. Every. Single. Day.

So as you can see, I have a lot of work to do. I didn't squander the rest of October bitching and moaning. Instead I made a plan.

I started to research different workout options. The gym is not an option.  After reading many, many, many reviews, I decided on P90X. I bought an opened unused kit on ebay for $58. The seller made me laugh with this: "I bought this for my husband and he opened the box but never, ever, not even once, played even one of the DVDs."

I have the free weights and yoga mat, but I purchased a set of weighted bands and a pull up bar that goes in a doorway.

I dug out the DVD player from the crawl space. Why they don't sell these programs on iTunes is beyond me.

I have a loose diet plan ready to go, that includes a lot of high protein drinks and bars, as well as, other healthy snacks and meals. All fast, all easy. I won't have a lot of time for meal prep with hour+ long workouts 6 days a week, work, and caring for the kids. So fast and easy it must be for the next 90 days.

When will I work out? The sacred afternoon nap. Which means I will be working during the morning nap and after bedtime. Blech! It's only for 90 days. I can do it.

90 days is a long time so I have worked in some rewards.

• 30 day reward: pedicure
• 45 day reward: night out
• 60 day reward: vacation (already previously scheduled)
• 75 day reward: New shoes with heels
• 90 day reward: Shopping!

Goals.
By the end of 90 days, I want to see lean muscle, a flat stomach, blonde hair, smooth skin, and a new, non-mom wardrobe. That's not too much, right?

Every 30 days I will have new before/after photos so stay tuned to The Mandy Project.